I just don’t get the boner over pumpkin spice friggin’ everything that occurs in this country as soon as Labor Day hits. It’s like the official first day of Fall happens when coffee shops start promoting this vile tasting oversweet concoction. White girls in yoga pants come out of the woodwork like an army of pumpkin zombies and run to get a cup. Now, I’m not saying I hate pumpkin as in fact I love me a good slice or two of pumpkin pie during the holiday season. Throw on a scoop of good old fashioned vanilla ice cream and I’m in dessert bliss. It’s just that the sheeple in this country go way overboard with this nasty trend. Most things that are pumpkinated are really not that good, and taste either really bland or super sugery. Not withstanding the fact that many of these pumpkined food and drinks are filled with chemicals to attain the fake flavor we put in our bodies which can’t be all that healthy. Yuck. Sorry, but I’ll pass. Not a pumpkin spice fan. Sorry, not sorry.
I think it’s as crazy as when we start seeing Christmas stuff in the stores before Halloween, and the ads that are already starting to pop up on TV already. Stop! Slow the eff down!
I mean, you have to admit it gets kind of crazy when all of a sudden every store, ad, and Facebook timeline update starts to feature pumpkin spice everything. Non-stop.
I love coffee. Just a good regular cup o’ joe. Sometimes a nice cappuccino. I don’t want my coffee to taste like some weird gourd that we pay no attention to until Halloween.
Also, does everything we eat have to have some strange pumpkin flavoring added to it? It’s like these companies have some stoned out of their minds food scientists mixing and matching everything with pumpkin. No, I don’t want my lunch buritto pumpkin flavored!
What’s next? Pumpkin spiced for his or her pleasure?
Or this for that special someone in your life? Oh hellz no!
Next thing we know it will be part of our entertainment on stage and screen. As if this group wasn’t bad enough already….
Heck, it is the preferred Fall season hot beverage of not only white girls in yoga pants but hipsters everywhere! Since they are ruining Brooklyn, and most of us can’t stand them, these posers fit in quite well with this fake drink.
Personally, I just can’t even. I can’t literally even!
I think this sounds like a great script for a horror movie. Fall release of course. With theaters serving pumpkin flavored popcorn, sodas, and candy. Everyone attending will be wearing yoga pants as admission requirement.
It’s unavoidable. Unescapable. Like we have been replaced by the pumpkin spice pod people. As the Borg leader in Star Trek proclaimed “Resistance is Futile”. Fight back with all your will people! Don’t give in to this tyrannical entity!
As for me, well, I’m over it already. Nope. Nada. As the anti-drug campaign slogan says – Just Say No!
Brilliant, Phil! I had my first (and only) pumpkin spice latte for the first time last year and didn’t see what the fuss was about. It was ok, but it wasn’t OMG-it’s-here-it’s-here-I-have-to-have-it delicious. After all, it’s no Shamrock Shake. Now that is a flavor I can get behind.
Hey Jessica!
I agree. I’m also not wowed by all the fake pumpkin spice stuff that everyone goes crazy over. Now the shamrock shake. That is another story. Like the McRib, yum!
OMG! I am so with you on this one, Phil. I do most of my writing days at MY favorite Starbucks and it is a BIG brouhaha when Pumpkin Spice finally hits the flavor pumps.
I’m sitting at SBUX now, and had only to turn left to see a BIG ole’ round Pumpkin Spice Latte pic below “Fall Rituals.”
My fall ritual? Eating the leftover Halloween Candy, thank you very much.
I’ll have my green tea straight, my coffee black and — sometimes — with a shot of espresso.
Hey Gloria!
The Starbucks creatures go nuts over this stuff. Especially all the girls in yoga pants! Along with the crazy moms that take over every seat at my local Starbucks when it comes out. I just don’t get it. Give me a regular cup o joe anytime. Or an iced coffee. Glad you agree with me. Us normal folk.
Well. Ahem. Aw heck, I’ll just admit it. I’m a white woman that loves pumpkin spice coffee, purchased at the local WaWa after seeing my grandson off on the school bus- in my yoga pants.
Hey Peggy!
LOL! I just knew a few of my readers were pumpkin spice fanatics! Hey, whatever floats your boat, right? Enjoy!
I’m neither to the far right nor the far left of this critical, life altering issue, I’m right in the middle. I do like some pumpkin flavored items but there are definitely some foods and drinks with that awful fake pumpkin spice flavoring that makes me spit it out and walk away shaking my head.
Hey Karen!
Yup – that sounds about right. Most of it sucks but there is the occasional pumpkin something that actually tastes good and won’t make you spit it out! I do love my pumpkin pie though!
I don’t like all the pumpkin stuff they come out with. If I want pumpkin I’ll eat it any time of year and it’s likely to be pumpkin bread or muffins. I hate these cookies and coffees things.
Hey Emily!
Yeah, the flavored coffees and candies mostly taste like ass. Now, the pumpkin muffins at Sarabeth’s with some jam is something I can always enjoy!
Love this blog post. I agree pumpkin everything is out of control.
Hey Andy!
Thanks for dropping by and commenting!
Yup -out of control is the way to describe this terrible food trend.
Love the post, Phil… but yeah, I’m a Pumpkin Spice lover when it comes to coffee creamer anyway. SOOO good! However, I agree that not everything “pumpkin flavored” is good. I had a Pumpkin Spice greek yogurt… pumpkin is NOT meant to be in yogurt. Ewww!!
Hey Tree!
Glad you enjoyed my rant! Yuck – pumpkin spiced Greek yogurt? That is just so wrong.
I am with you 1000%. Just say no to pumpkin spice. Unless it’s in a pumpkin.
Hey Cassandra!
Just say no for sure. Unless it’s a hot slice of pumpkin pie with a scoop of ice cream. Drool.
Just give me plain old pumpkin pie with a dollop of cool whip and I’m happy. No need for pumpkin anything else…unless it includes chocolate 😉
Hey Mary!
I agree. I love a tasty slice of pumpkin pie. Cool whip or ice cream. No need for all this fake pumpkin crap that the sheeple gush over. Yuck.
I’m over here from Susie’s party and just kind of looking around. I agree about the pumpkin spice, especially in coffee. Don’t mess with my coffee! Thanks for the smiles. 🙂
Hey Jackie!
Thanks for dropping by and commenting! Susie throws some great blog parties. I’m usually hungover after them.
Yup – I’m the same. Don’t mess with my cup of java!
I can’t say I’ve ever had the ?pleasure of pumpkin spice. But if it’s big in the US, give it 5 years and it will be big over here in the UK – although, based on your review, I can’t say I’m looking forward to it.
Hey Gary!
I hope the UK stays away from this nasty trend. I wish it would just go away. I will admit the Southern Tier Pumpking Spice beer is pretty good though. Worth a pint!
Hehehe Phil! Pumpkin spice is EVERYWHERE! Coffees, pies and so much more, as you point out in such a hilarious way here 😀 Have a safe Halloween out there!
Hey Christy!
It’s shoved down our throats so much that I can’t stand it anymore! Pleased that you got a laugh out of my torment!