Go home Spring you’re drunk!


Ok, what the hell is going on here? Enough of the cold raw weather already. ENOUGH! It’s like Spring has taken a nap, gone on vacation, or just turned off the switch and forgot to flip it back on. Spring is toying with us here in the Northeast. It temps us with a few nice days and Spring-like temperatures, then pulls a Fall-like day out of it’s ass and dumps a chilly day like today on us. I mean, what the heck are you doing Spring? Are you drunk or something? Why you hating on us? Where has the love gone? You’ve lost that lovin’ feeeeeeeling…….


Look, we have a long Winter season to begin with. After all these months of dreary cold air and shorter winter days we crave some warmer sunny days. I am sure in a few months when we are in the midst of super hot and humid swamp ass days we will wish it was cold again, but for now we just want to relish in the throes of some real Spring days. I sort of remember that not in the too distant past we actually enjoyed Spring. It used to be warm and sunny. We played. We frolicked. We basked in the rays of the warm sun. Lately though it seems as if the bird of paradise has pooped on our parade. It’s only in the 40’s right now. That’s fine in November or December when I actually enjoy wearing a nice coat, but c’mon already!

heatmiserHold on a sec. What is this I see? It’s supposed be in the low 70’s tomorrow. Oh joy! This is the most schizophrenic Spring I have ever seen. It’s like Snow Miser and Heat Miser can’t make up their minds and keep playing rocks-paper-scissors as to who will take over that day. Get it together boys! We are getting impatient down here. Make up your damn minds! Can you just let Heat Miser take over now and run with the ball for the next six months? (Even though I do like Snow Miser better as Heat Miser is a bit of a douche)

SnowMiserWell, let’s hope the weather forecast is correct and we actually get an extended spell of real Spring-like days. Because if we drop back into gloomy days and 40 degree temps someone is gonna put a contract out on Snow Miser’s life! We ain’t messing around here anymore!

34 thoughts on “Go home Spring you’re drunk!”

  1. Sounds like a typical Alaskan Spring. LOL SO glad we moved to Arizona where we’ve been roller coastering between highs in the 90s to highs in the 70s. And that’s a wicked giggle you hear in the distance. 😉

  2. (There’s a song there somewhere…..)
    Winter has just suddenly arrived on our doorstep with a bang. Have had to take out my winter clothes – I hate winter – means I can’t show off my boobs or tramp stamp for awhile 🙂

  3. Hope the weather improves for you soon Phil. The temperatures have recently started to improve a bit over here in the UK. Nearly air con time in the office!

  4. I’m convinced Mother Nature is in the height of Menopause. She needs to get herself on some natural supplements and get herself together before we jump right into a heat wave.

  5. I’m so sick of it too. Usually by this time of year we’re spending time out on the back deck, not on the couch wrapped up in blankets like mummies. Enough.

  6. LMAO!
    Couldn’t have said it better myself.
    It’s a shame I can’t load an image to accompany yours. I recently got a funny sent to me that also sums up the non-event of Spring.
    It’s the same in Europe: sunny one day, overcast the next, then it’s back to freezing cold. We used to have 4 distinct seasons. Not anymore! The most dominant element is the rain. OMG! It RAINS!!! It’s like the movie Blade Runner came true! We used to have ‘April Showers’ and we still get rain during that month – and a LOT of it, but these days it’s the prologue to the ‘June Monsoon’.

    1. Hey John!

      Glad you got a good laugh! I have always heard the weather in the UK is like pea soup. I am shocked that it is actually sunny and about 60 right now here in NYC! Time for a long lunch!

    1. Hey Jess!

      Thanks for dropping by my blog! Glad we could exchange links and support each other’s sites. Hopefully, the warmer weather is here to stay!

    1. Hi Tracey!

      Thanks for dropping by my blog! What part of TX? I have family in San Antonio.

      Yeah, Spring has taken a step back and it’s only in the 50’s here right now. I am losing my sense of humor too!

      1. Dallas-Fort Worth – but we got to San Antonio all the time. I can’t afford to put two adults and three kids on a plane to anywhere. So if I can’t drive there quickly, we aren’t going. 🙂

  7. Yep, lol, we got the same retarded weather out here by Buffalo. It was beautiful out a few days ago, in the 70’s, then it got freezing cold and snowed last night. My brother who lives in Michigan is talking about moving someplace warmer cause he is tired of this weather himself. We never really had spring yet over here. Before we know it , spring will be gone, which didn’t even exist this year, with nothing but cold weather. Then summer will come and it will snow in July.

    1. Hey Susana!

      It seems like Spring just doesn’t happen anymore and we jump right into humid summer! If it snows in summer we might as all well just move to the North Pole!

  8. We had hail yesterday in south east MI. I’m thinking of curling up with that groundhog under the garage. Mama says God is punishing us, but I think he’s just a sadist.

  9. Spring is FINALLY here. Torrential rainstorms and flooding followed by snowy icy death pellets was a pretty awful start to the season…but it can only get better from here, right?

    1. Hello Chrissy!

      Thanks for dropping by my blog!

      Damn – where the heck do you live? That doesn’t sound like Spring it sounds like Armageddon! 🙂

  10. AMEN! We just had 10 inches of snow over the past two days here. I can’t remember the last time it has snowed in May! I am sick of it. Might have to pack up and move to some tropical island…oh wait, I need money to do that 🙁

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