Overall, I am a pretty patient and tolerant guy. I can put up with a lot, and often let things slide. It helps keep the stress levels low, and the blood pressure in a safe zone. There are times though that I am seconds away from becoming a flight risk! I like people. I really do. Yet at times they really test my patience. Sometimes I think the gene pool has not been too kind to some of these lunkheads. I run into these people in all walks of life – in the gym, at the store, at work, out on the street, you name it! They are everywhere, and I am sure many of us have experienced these “special people” first hand. Here’s a quick sampling I decided to embellish on as I ran into a few already today!
– What is up with people who get to the register then take 15 minutes to dig through their pockets or purse to try and find a way of paying?
Then, they want to ask a million stupid questions while holding up everyone behind them. Of course, this always seems to happen when you are in a rush, or really need to hit the bathroom!
– What is up with the old guys in the gym locker rooms who are fat and out of shape but feel the need to let their junk swing everywhere?
They come out of the steam room or shower, and will proceed to talk with you in the nasty buff. Or sit on a bench naked and take their sweet time getting ready.
I mean really grandpa, cover up and have a little humility. No one, I mean NO ONE, wants to see your saggy naked ass in their face!
– What is up with co-workers who try to prepare a three-course meal in the mini kitchen using the only microwave available and the water cooler?
You’re at work. Bring a damn sandwich, salad, or easy to prepare ready to eat microwave meal. The rest of us are getting impatient waiting for you to get the heck out of our way!
– What is up with people who don’t see you are standing on a line patiently waiting?
No matter if I am in a grocery, the deli, theater, bar, bathroom, etc, there is always some douchenozzle who conveniently tries to ignore the line and cut right up front. These people deserve a beating.
– What is up with the throng of co-workers who like clockwork every winter attack you with requests to buy Girl Scout cookies?
It’s like all of a sudden I have 20 people asking me to buy boxes of these cookies for their daughters, nieces, granddaughters, neighbor’s kid, and any other child they associate with who are hawking for Girl Scouts. You all know I can’t resist those damn delicious thin mints! Now they have a new Mango Cream cookie? No one is safe. Kill me now.
– What is up with the strangers always wanting to strike up a conversation with me when I am minding my own business?
It happens everywhere. I could be reading the paper, working out, waiting for a subway, in the diner, even listening to my ipod with my earbuds in. Hello –STFU! I don’t want to talk to you!
– What is it with people always asking me for money?
I must have a friendly face or something. Maybe I have a sign on my head that says “beggar money magnet”. Three dozen people will walk by, ignore them, and then they single me out to harass for change.
– What is up with personal trainers that look one cheeseburger away from a heart attack?
Maybe it’s just me, but I would never trust a trainer who looks like they don’t work out, lift weights, do cardio, are fat and soft, or just too damn skinny with little muscle tone. Same goes for people who sell gym memberships. Hit the weights. Look the damn part people!
– What is up with daylight savings time?
Do we really need it anymore? The federal government doesn’t require U.S. states or territories to observe daylight saving time. Arizona and Hawaii, along with Puerto Rico, the Virgin Islands, and a bunch of others don’t mess with their clocks. I’m so over it.
Some days I wish I would have just stayed home in bed!
I always get that person in the grocery line who lolly gags and blocks off the aisles, then gets in line behind me…and either bump me with their carts as they line up behind me because either I’m invisible or they’re just rude. Or worse, they get behind me and huff and puff like suddenly they’re in a hurry and the world is on fire.
And there are out of shape trainers? Yuck. That’s as bad as walking in to a strip club only to find out the ladies are all 8 months pregnant. :-/
Hahahahaha! I’m surprised you haven’t given anyone a beat down!
Yeah, I see trainers who don’t look the part every day at my gym.
So, where are these pregger clubs? I’ll be sure to avoid throwing my stack of dollar bills around there! 😉
Thanks for reading Kitt!
Don’t go certain small towns in SW Florida…just sayin’. I mean, sometimes you only see that at Hooters, but sometimes… They’re at the club…and not just on Amateur night.
As for the beat down…it’s been a near thing at times, but like I said, I’m scary in my self control. Often, all I have to do is turn around & look at someone in the eye to scare the crap out of them. 😉
LOL! I know what you mean by FL. My parents live in Ocala. I have been down there many times. There are some scary strip clubs down there!
I would be scared of your evil eye!
great rants!
That office one is right on point. We dont even have a mini kitchen or a break room. Its just random offices with fridges and microwaves. So when you want to heat up your lunch, you get to do it in Joe Smiths Office, while is working. And then you can take your lunch to eat at your desk. Why so many people gain weight here, they would rather eat at McDs than at their desk.
And i get pissed when they dont clean the micro, heat something that requires 12 minutes on 50% power, or smells rotten.
Office ettiquette 101:
No Fish
No heating anything that requires 5 minutes or more
If im at my desk and eating- go the fuck away.
P.S. the soup i made yesterday was with lean and reduced fat chicken. the only way to lighten it up would be the omit the croissant, use less tortellini and less parm. Otehrwise, the meatballs are low fat, the chicken broth is fat free and the spinach is virtually water.
Hey Mo!
Glad you liked the new post! Glad to see I am not the only one who has rude office coworkers! Yes, the no fish rule is tops!
“If im at my desk and eating- go the fuck away.” – made me spit out my coffee! 🙂
Also, that soup recipe is perfect for today!
I normally worked from home at my last job. When I did spend time in the office, I once saw one of the assistant with a dinner with all the fixing including cranberry sauce. What time would you have to get up in the morning to pack all of that stuff up? And how do you stay awake to get anything done at that full course meal? I guess that is why she was the size of large house.
Hey Cynthia!
I swear I see people here preparing meals like they are in competition on the Food Network! Next Iron Chef?
All we need is Gordon Ramsey yelling at them now!
Don’t you wonder what is going through their mind when they cart all the food in. I laugh when I see them in the elvator with a bag bigger than mine and it is all food.
They are hoping no one wants to ask them to share! 😉
All of these are very good points, especially the first two! Number two is a regular occurrence at my local gym and it is not a pleasant sight.
Hello Dan!
Thanks for dropping by my blog. Glad you agree with some of my rants! Good to know I am not the only one!
Ah man, this made me laugh!
Hey Holly!
Glad I gave you a chuckle!
Thanks for reading!
My favorite is when I get stuck behind the old person deciding that they need to write a check at walmart in front of me. I never write checks at a store and it is so annoying 🙂 Plus it takes them five minutes to remember that it’s all automated and all they have to do is sign the check!
Hey Frugal!
Haha! I don’t see many people use checks anymore. Everything is charged with credit/debit cards nowadays.
Maybe it’s a “People of Walmart ” thing? 🙂
I can relate to your statements, lol. Grocery shopping can become very annoying depending on who is in front of me. There were countless times when the person in front of me had coupons that didn’t work. Then they would make everyone wait because they would make a point of arguing with the cashier over losing a dollar over something stupid. That would take forever, I end up having to move to a different line.
I really dislike people who argue about coupons. Coupons are for 10, 15, 30, 50 cents. If you are that hard up and you can not afford the extra .50. Leave that item off your grocery list.
Hi Cynthia!
I use coupons (hey I like to save cash too) but won’t argue and hold a line up for 15 minutes. Some of these “couponers” are cray cray!
Hi Phil,
I am a coupon user. I just don’t like the binder people and the ones that are fighting with the cashier over the coupons. Move on life is too short.
Oh, those soccer moms with their binders of coupons are mercenary! Don’t mess with Extreme Couponers!
Hi Susana!
I have had that same situation occur in front of me countless times! Drives me nuts! Good to see others are also bothered by this!
My absolute pet peeve in the world are people in grocery stores who are not prepared when they get to the register or they are running back to get something. Not to mention the mother with the 7 kids in tow and the binder full of coupons that she is is scanning page by page while discplined her unmanaged maternal load of little people. And the person who gets to the register and asked the $10 a hour clerk if she can get a discount because something has a stain on it. That makes me postal. She makes $10.00 dollars a hour, she has no authority. When I get to the register, that is a clue that I am ready to leave the store and if there is a line that is an indication that the people behind me are in the same mood so I feel that I need to get on with it, pay and get going.
Hey Cynthia!
Guess you like all my rants and raves! 😉
The people runnng back to get something drive me nuts! If I see lines like those I quickly scan for another. Or, I will go back to shopping to kill time and come back. Sometimes, I just bail and hit a pub!
Thanks for reading and all the comments!
Lucky you. I have to drive. I gave up the drinking and driving after college. I thought that I should not get a criminal record since I was $$$$ in debt and then the child came so I have to total big SUV thing going so I have to wait til I get home for my wine and vent to my spouse about having to shop.
HAHAHA! I did the same thing. So glad I never got caught! Now I would never even think of doing that!
Nothing wrong with popping a bottle of wine at home on the couch!
Oh, Phil. You are really losing it. You better be careful or you’ll start to sound like my dad, a la: http://backhomeblog.com/2012/10/01/daddyism-1/
…just sayin’.
I have to patently disagree on the girl scout cookies though. I’m going to have to go hunt down someone in my office to buy some, and then I will buy 12 boxes to get me through to next year.
Hi Jill!
The Girl Scout cookie hawkers are already attacking me! Must. Resist.
As Dad would say – “hey you kids – off my lawn!”
Talking about me, you doing a bit of ranting yourself there pal…
LOL! It’s what I do bro! Call it my “casual observations of life”.
You must be a weirdo magnet like me. : )
What’s up the damn Girl Scout cookie hawkers? It’s like a shakedown.
I never understood why old men wear Speedos in public. It should be illegal, along with selling Girl Scout cookies at work. It’s probably the same guy who put a Turkey in the microwave. LOL! Great picture and pictures.
P.S. The elderly usually approach me at the supermarket.
Yes! It’s not just me!
Those Girl Scout cookie hawkers are like dealing with a cult! The old guys in speedos are also a no-no. The things nightmares are made of!
Thanks for reading and commenting Lauren!
Someone at our office used to heat up all sorts of veggies every single day for lunch. I’m glad he was keeping it healthy, however, broccoli is not okay at work….EVER. And using 2 microwaves to make 1 meal is just ridiculous.
LOL! I bet that used to stink up the place!
And using two microwaves? That is a foul! Into the penalty box!
It used to seep into the vents…it wasn’t pretty.
FEBREEZE!!!
The person who puts their keys, their wallet and their other crap ON THE COUNTER. Are you moving in? This is a business transaction that should take about 45 seconds. And you seem surprised that you have been asked for some form of payment. Did you just arrive from a socialist country or was it a soup kitchen? We use money here.
Hi Astro!
LOL! My thoughts exactly! It always amazes me when people do that. Be ready to pay and move on!
Thank you for the opportunity to meet