The Money Shot of Hot Dogs – Crif Dogs NYC!

Now that’s a threesome to get excited about!

I never had wanted to shove a tube of meat deep inside me as much as I had when I encountered Crif!

Boy, that sounds soooo dirty, doesn’t it? The honest truth is that I loved swallowing every inch of this meat goodness down my throat.

Wait! What the hell did I just say? This isn’t a porn shoot!

Eating a Crif Dog does feel like erotic perfection though. Crispy bacon sexiness wrapped around an all beef hot dog, and engulfed with creamy toppings, and fitted into a soft bun sleeve. Alluring and crave-inducing they are like a fetish you secretly harbor. Armed with a recent Groupon deal of $5 for $10 worth of food I came into this den of hot dog debauchery ready to explore my inner meat craving.

Photo credit - Kara S - Yelp
Photo credit – Kara S – Yelp

While waiting on the long line to order I decided to go for a threesome. The Tsumani dog – bacon wrapped house dog topped with teriyaki, pineapple, and green onions. Chihuahua dog – bacon wrapped house dog topped with avocado, and sour cream. Washed down with a cold PBR! All I can say is God Bless America! So happy to live in a country where we can explore our deepest desires so freely. No matter how bizarre they might seem. I savored and enjoyed the taste of each dog with it’s unique toppings. Tasty and savory all at once. Left me wanting for more. Bow-chicka-bow-wow!

Did I tell you they are wrapped in bacon? OH MYYYY!!!
Did I tell you they are wrapped in bacon? OH MYYYY!!!

When you enter this below-ground dimly lit cave of a place be prepared to wait in line until the tatted-up Betty Page like dominatrix behind the counter portal to bacon and meat takes your order. There are a lot of creations to choose from weather it be just a straight up house dog to an exotic muse of your liking. There is sure to be something here for everyone’s inner hot dog desires. Experiment with no shame.

Crif Dogs are the money shot of the hot dog biz!

Photo credit  - Rob J - Yelp
Photo credit – Rob J – Yelp



Crif Dogs –

Crif Dogs on Urbanspoon

24 thoughts on “The Money Shot of Hot Dogs – Crif Dogs NYC!”

  1. Bow-chicka bow-wow indeed! I love the look of this place and well, the sign would make even the most uptight people just a little curious.

  2. My quest to find the perfect hotdog has reached the end of its journey. Sort of.

    Please send airfare for NYC.

    WOWZA! I love their in-your-face (punny?) sign. And, your description of these delicacies? I’ll simply say that had a female written those words (sans the “bite”), she’d have a line of NYC dudes following her around asking for contact Intel.

    When (not if) my travels north bring me to your city, I will expect a (plutonic!) day-on-the-town with an in-the-know man. What? You volunteer?

    What a foolish delightful offer. Now, hand me a dog and an ice cream cone. I have some male libido research to do for my manuscript.

  3. Phil! Has Crif hired you for media and promo? I hope you sent them a copy of this post because no one could give them a better write-up! I have to admit your lead-up had me wondering if you were moving into some erotic genre posts here … really…

    I have to confess I do like me a good hot dog and these sound scrumptious.

    And “bow-chicka-bow-wow”??? Is that a bit of New York slang or your own creation? It’s got a certain je ne sais quoi about it!

    1. Hey Patricia!

      Maybe I should try to get a job as their P.R. agent?

      Maybe I should start an “erotic food porn literature” blog site. NC-17 of course!

      They are good hot dogs!

  4. Phil, you’re making me hungry… boy those dogs look good! here in Chicago we have Portillo’s a suburb thing with Chicago style dogs – mustard – no ketchup, onions, and a pickle…I’d love to try one. Have a great day!

    1. Hey Clay!

      A few people have mentioned Portillo’s. I need to put this on my list next time I am in Chicago! Nothing like a good tasty hot dog!

  5. Agreed an awesome dog. The only thing better, “Groupon Deal” at Crif Dogs. Don’t forget Ms Pac Man video game and more PBR’s………..

  6. Hey Phil…Surprising as this may be, I’m not much for swallowing sausage or hot dogs. Occassionally I’ll enjoy a beef dog, but that’s not a frequent occurrence. The ones you had on the above plate, though? I’d make an exception for… They look tasty.

    I don’t think there are any really decent hotdog places near me, so I’ll probably have to wait till I get back to Chicago if I want to experiment. (Even at Portillos I prefer their Beefs.)

    1. Hey Kitt!

      On my list is to hit Chicago this year for a weekend and grab a few of their famous dogs there.

      Still surprised you don’t like a tasty hunk of meat in your mouth! 😉

  7. God Bless America! All I can say is God Help England as we NEED places like that here. I can’t remember the last time I ate a hot dog but I’d have this in a second. It just looks so tasty, saucy, juicy. I can hear it saying ‘come to me, come to me, I’ll be yours tonight’.
    I’m starving and it’s only 08.42am.

    1. Hey Jill!

      Oh, so you know Crif’s! I never had their veggie dog, but I can bet it is good.

      Especially if it’s wrapped in crispy bacon!!!

  8. If this is the domanatrix of hot dogs, then chain me up and whip me. Yes, please!

    On another note, I really need to find a job in a bigger area — one that Groupon deals with. Man, you have some great things you’ve had the chance to get at good prices!

Feel free to comment! We all have opinions!