Tag Archives: Starbucks

Tide Pods, Hot Cocoa, Naughty Words, and My Frozen Kibbly Bits.

Eat up kids! Yummy yum yum!

Why do I put myself through this?

That was the thought that ran through my mind as the wind ripped across my back, and sent a shiver down to my bones, as if Mother Nature herself pummeled me with snowballs. The weather had been a bit warmer here in NYC, so I decided to jump into the NYCRUNS Cocoa Classic 5K in Riverside Park on a Saturday morning a few weekends ago. Well, warmer by winter standards as it had been in the 30’s and 40’s most of the week leading up to the race. I had no clue, as was the case with many of the other race participants I encountered, that the temps would take an overnight nose-dive into the teens. At race time it was 19 degrees, with a wind chill that made it feel half that. Also, considering it was already windy and the race course was in the park along the water, surely made for a mind-numbing frigid run. Thank goodness it was a sunny clear day out.

Can we say, “frostbite conditions”? More like “freezing our kibbles and bits off”! That’s putting it lightly! Continue reading Tide Pods, Hot Cocoa, Naughty Words, and My Frozen Kibbly Bits.

Did Satan design those Starbucks red cups this year?

funny latte
What the heck is wrong with people in the world lately?

With so many things going on with violence, abuse, the economy, the political rantings of crazy hair Trump, and mostly trying to figure out if Glenn is alive or deceased on The Walking Dead people have gone apeshit over a cup. Yes, a meaningless stupid red coffee cup. Really people, there are so many other pressing matters in the world to be concerned about than this call to arms for those overly crazy Christian zealots screaming out about a “war on Christmas”. If you are judging your bearing on the religion you adhere to based on a Starbucks coffee cup then you really have to look deep inside your own soul. Or lack of a brain. You all sound like complete morons. Let it go people, and enjoy your Peppermint Mochas. No one is trying to destroy your Christmas spirit by not placing a few decorative pics on your cup. Oh, and yes, whipped cream please! Continue reading Did Satan design those Starbucks red cups this year?

Do girls poop? That, and other NYC mysteries of flatulence.

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Do girls poop? I was recently confronted with that question and still pondering an answer. Does anyone really know? It’s one of those mysteries of the universe. When dating we never really see them go to the bathroom to take a hairy dump. If they do go it’s usually for a quick pee so there is no way they can squeeze out a quick one in that time. Not like us dudes as we can clip off some cable in minutes and be right back at the dinner table without missing a beat. Plus, don’t even suggest they go in a public place! That is akin to heresy! Here in NYC there is a definite lack of clean public restrooms to use other than finding a Starbucks without a line of people waiting as long as at the DMV. Even some of those can be pretty scary at times. Women will actually hold it in all day than sacrifice sitting their butt flesh on a foreign toilet seat. Just do the hover! I could never do that to myself. Guys are like bears and the whole city is our woods, or toilet bowl so to speak. I have discovered some ingenious spots to get relief – hotels, restaurants, gyms, porta potties, behind a parked car, etc. Oh, don’t ever ask a girl to go in a porta pottie unless you want to experience the “stink eye” and a smack upside your head. A porta pottie to a women is pretty much the last resort, and like asking them to enter the third portal of Hell itself. There are some things that just can not be unseen in them. Continue reading Do girls poop? That, and other NYC mysteries of flatulence.

Hey NYC – What the heck is in that backpack?

 

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Seriously, what the heck are you dragging around in there? I have often wondered that myself on a daily basis here in NYC as I see people from all walks of life wearing backbacks nowadays. Growing up I never wore one of these things. In fact, I never even owned one until recently when I received it as a reward for a charity event I participated in. I used it once to carry my necessities to the Tough Mudder I did a few months back. Now it sits in a corner of my closet gathering dust and taking up space. I just don’t get why so many people see fit to wear these things every day back and forth to work or wherever they are going. I hate carrying around anything extra with me, or on me, when heading out of our apartment. I like to be loose and free. It just irritates me to no end when some of these backpack morons push into a crowded subway car wearing these things and blast me with it. Common courtesy dictates one takes it off when we are all packed in like sardines in the human orgy and non-consenting grinder that is the NYC subway system. Bad enough when some weirdo stranger, smelly dude, or over perfumed lady is rubbing up against you in a not so convivial or welcomed manner. Hey, rush hour on the NYC MTA will certainly force you to know your fellow New Yorkers up close and personal whether you like it or not! Having a backpack slammed into your face is even better! Not! I almost went all “road rage” on some hipster doofus the other day who kept hitting into me with it but refused to take it off. Really, what is so important that you need this thing attached to you? What are you hiding in there? Hmmmmm…….. Continue reading Hey NYC – What the heck is in that backpack?