Well, that was a fun ride!
When I started to pursue a running regimen, I had little clue as to where it would take me. I have always exclaimed that I am one of those who has a love/hate relationship with running. What started out as a challenge to myself and use it as a tool to burn calories and cut weight became an obsession. In less than two years, starting back in March of 2016, has culminated with me just completing my 30th official race event. Mostly 5K’s with some 4 and 5 mile races thrown in. Wow! I really never thought I would get this far, yet here I am, and I am not about to quit anytime soon.
These legs have a lot more to go. Run, Forrest, Run! Continue reading The Joy of 30 with an Ugly Sweater, Santa, and Boozy Hot Chocolate!
Christmas, yes, we are here again. There are those who embrace the holidays and those who shudder at the thought of them. Hey, at least it’s almost hitting 70 degrees here in NYC. In December. Yeah, there’s no such thing as global warming you say? Time to break out the mistletoe speedos and throw a shrimp on the barbie!
When someone offers you egg nog at a friend or family’s house you drink the nog. Especially if it has real booze in it. Because nog dammit! Don’t worry about the fat and calories. Just release your gluttonous desires and drink up! It’s Christmas time! Break out the sweatpants!
Oh, and if National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation or Elf is on TV you watch them. It’s tradition, and also because they are goofy fun. Why watch the depressing It’s a Wonderful Life when you can view Cousin Eddie driving Clark Griswold absolutely nuts. Pop open the Jack Daniels egg nog and drink it right out of the bottle. Squirrel! Continue reading The Zen of Egg Nog in a Griswold Christmas Kind of World
Ho Ho Ho and a bottle of Jack Daniels. Santa made his appointed rounds last night and here we are at another NYC Christmas. He committed breaking and entering and snuck in while you were all sleeping to deposit who knows what in your households. Rummaging through your panty drawers. Oh, don’t mind that thing floating in your toilet. Consider it a “personal” gift from the jolly fat man himself. He might also have a few thousand illegitimate little elves running around the house by this time next year. Good luck getting him on the Maury show as Santa only “comes” one a year. Hey, his magical Viagra is quite potent and maybe hanging that mistletoe in your doorway might not have been a good idea in hindsight. Santa needs a little extra oomph to get him through a long evening of gift giving!
Now that it’s Christmas morning we can all look forward to a house full of joy and merriment. The horrendous trips to the mall are over. Shopping alongside hordes of unruly people, and zombies, are done. Kids running around screaming and tearing into presents. Mom and dad fighting over the presents they gave each other, or didn’t. The family members near and far that you can’t tolerate arriving and making a mess of your place, along with emptying out your liquor cabinet. You get stuck cooking for everyone. The bathroom gets bombed and the john overflows. Fa la la la la – shoot me now. Continue reading Merry Christmas & Happy Holidays from NYC Bad Santa!
Am I the only one that loathes the bombardment of Christmas commercials and decorations that we are subjected to these weeks before Thanksgiving? It’s already been one of those weeks here in NYC and I feel as if I’m being abused by the Elf on the Shelf. Now let’s be real here for a moment. That damn thing is creepy. No way do I want a psychopath elf in my house. I don’t know why this strange tradition was started anyway. It’s supposed to be moved to a different spot each night or something. Yeah, let’s traumatize our kids. No, let’s terrorize me because if that little bastard shows up in a different spot other than where I left him I’m burning down the damn house! I freak out a bit when I can’t find my keys and swear something moved them. Anyone remember that evil little Zuni fetish doll in the movie Trilogy of Terror? Yeah THAT evil effing thing that chased Karen Black around and attacked her. I just know that damn elf is the reincarnation of that crazy little shit. Waiting. Plotting. He’s as bad as a creepy clown.
Almost. Clowns suck too. And dolls. They also suck. Nope. Nope. Noppity Nope. Continue reading Buffalo Snow, Elf on a Shelf, Cocaine – All kinds of crazy stuff!