Tag Archives: porn

Valentine’s Day in NYC. Forever alone or happily psychotic!

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On Valentine’s Day remember what you really love about that special someone!

In honor of Valentine’s Day I’m going to go all reverse romance here. Let’s be real. It’s a made up holiday that benefits the greeting card industry and florists. Overpriced sappy cards and jacked up flower costs. Not to mention the horribly expensive and limited VDay pre-fixe menus here in NYC that are shoved down our throats like a ball gag in 50 Shades. Oh, and that horrible book has been made into a movie that just came out in time for the holiday weekend. Suburban sex starved soccer moms are rejoicing in giddy orgasmic bliss! Seriously, if any dudes are dragged to this mess to see it with their gals they might as well wear a skirt and apply a tampon up their mangina. Rotten Tomatoes has given it a dismal approval rating of 29% while IMDB has a rating of one and a half stars. Yet, I read there are plans to already make sequels. It’s just amazing to me what garbage the American public will consume for entertainment like cattle being led to the slaughter. They are making the author a ton of money like she is in the same writing league as J.K. Rowling. It’s just not right. Then again, if this is what passes for quality erotica nowadays then have at it I guess. I’m just happy to have a great gal with me that would rather go see the new action movie The Kingsmen, then head out for drinks after at a dive bar and listen to heavy metal from the jukebox. Now THAT is romance!

Also, as a great alternative to the movie and actually very funny parody of the book if you ever have a chance to see this musical in NYC then do it – 50 Shades! The Musical. Literally, the actor who portrays Mr Gray just kills it!

http://blog.theregularguynyc.com/50-shades-the-musical-raunchy-filthy-sexy-fun-in-nyc/

Hey, I know everyone is different and some love Valentine’s Day. They clamor that goopy cringe inducing stereotype of what the meaning of the day is meant to represent. Each has their own taste when it comes to romance and what gets their rocks off in the bedroom. Do whatever works for you I say. In the spirit of creepy chubby flying angels, cavity forming conversation hearts, broken flavored condoms, and heart shaped boxes of stale chocolates I present a few images in honor of this day of love! Ahhhh romance….. Continue reading Valentine’s Day in NYC. Forever alone or happily psychotic!

They find my blog through Superhero Penis Porn?

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Now that the holiday season is behind us and we are all recovered somewhat from Christmas shopping and New Years hangovers, there is time to relax and reflect a bit. Catching up on my blogging. Once in a while I take a peek into my blog stats as I’m sitting here naked on our rich Corinthian leather couch enjoying a cup of International Coffee (peppermint mocha) and peruse the search terms by which those out there are using to find my blog. Some are the run of the mill keywords which are as expected. Then there are those that are, well, a “bit disturbing” if that is a proper way to put it. I honestly have no clue as to why these word combinations lead to my blog. I mean, I know that I can be a bit warped at times, but am I really this insane? Just taking a looksie into the past week’s stats to start off the new year here are a few choice search terms I found were used to find my blog.

Penis Superhero Porn

What. The. Hell? Is this really a thing? I do know that the porn industry mimics the Hollywood blockbusters. Yet I have never heard of specific porn that features a “superhero penis.” Does it have a mind of it’s own? Continue reading They find my blog through Superhero Penis Porn?

“Does This Rag Smell Like Chloroform” Blog Party in My Pants!

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Welcome Welcome Welcome! Come on in. Let me take that coat. Saunter up to the bar and have a cocktail. Mix and mingle. What’s that you say? Why yes, this soiree is pants optional. I would have it no other way. Have some chips and dip. I made it myself with my special sauce. Secret ingredient that adds a little kick to it. Don’t even ask. So glad you could all cum, and not too early either. No one wants to be arrive prematurely. Kind of spoils the fun, and your underwear. Yet, this is a way to get a good seat for all the action. Relax! Spread your legs, enjoy, and let many sordid tales be told. I even wore my studded assless leather chaps for this one. Yes, I dress to impress.

Just wanted to offer a big shout out to all my guests! Thanks for dropping in. I see some of you even dressed for the occasion. Oh honey, you shouldn’t have worn that. Dude, does your mommy dress you in the dark. You purposely trying not to get laid? Oh, I kid, I kid. No really. Yes, I do. No. So glad you could all make it to my first ever virtual blog party where you get to take over my abode of a twisted blog. Don’t mind some of the creepers lurking around here. I’m sure by the end of the night anyway you’ll all be half naked in the bathroom doing strange things with my loofah to each other. All I ask is that you clean up after your nasty selves, and if some of you pervs end up in my bedroom be prepared to enter the world of internet porn. Not saying I have cameras hidden around my place. Oh, did you remember to sign the waiver and bring it with you? Just want to be protected in case some of you do damage to yourselves playing with the sex swing and assorted toys laying about. They are just for display purposes only. Wink Wink. Oh, don’t mind that little red light in the bookcase and behind the mirror. It’s nothing. Really. Continue reading “Does This Rag Smell Like Chloroform” Blog Party in My Pants!

In-N-Out Animal Style Food Porn in Vegas, baby!

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I know this is not NYC related, but I was just handed my hotel reservations for the next biz trip I have coming up in June. Vegas baby! The land of neon lights, gambling, drinking, gluttony, cheesiness, debauchery, and kitschy craziness! Vegas, as I have said in the past, you’re a dirty ho but I love you so. I am already thinking about where to make dinner reservations, and already I am craving this one thing that I had my last time in Sin City. 

My inner Fattasaurous won out and dragged me to In-N-Out Burger pretty much as soon as I touched down in Vegas the last time I was there in April!

After a few months of hard dieting and working out I needed this indulgence. Nay, I wanted this. I had to have it. The lusty beast within would not be denied this feast.
Continue reading In-N-Out Animal Style Food Porn in Vegas, baby!