Words just can’t describe my new found love for this craptacular bar! I mean, it has a freaking toilet as it’s profile picture on review sites. How can you not love a dive bar that gives new meaning to what a dive is supposed to be about? Oddly unique, yet you feel afraid for your safety just a bit, but still drawn to it like a drug addict trapped in a crack house.
Um, what is this dark weird little fake bar before a bar that you have to pass through to get to The Duck? Is this a dive speakeasy kind of thing? Some beefy dude at the door checks your ID and lets you in. You meander through the empty faux bar in front to get to the entrance of the real bar.
Then it hits you when you walk in. What is this wonderful place that looks like a hospital or insane asylum basement dorm room decorated in the most makeshift way? It’s almost as if a bunch of drunk college kids watched Animal House and decided to make mom and dad’s basement a dive bar with crap they found on the side of the road or in a dumpster. There are wires, cables, extension cords, and surge protectors hanging all over the place. One short and the place goes up in a burst of flame! Beer signage, strange memorabilia, and old discarded bras hang on the wall and ceiling. Christmas lights. A few tables and chairs to sit at next to the bar. A pool table in front of a large projection flat screen from 1990 which I think is broken. Continue reading I love The Duck – a trashy weirdo dive bar in NYC!
(Photo Credit – Essex)
Let me preface this review by proclaiming –
THAT I AM TOTALLY F**KING DRUNK OFF MY ASS RIGHT NOW!
Wow, am I sh*tfaced and totally rocked from what turned out to be a six and a half hour brunch bender. I don’t remember much of what I ate, and I am still trying to figure out where my pants are, but I had a great Sunday!
Holy Crapola! Did you know that Economy Candy is right across the street? (One of the most amazing old school candy stores in NYC!) This place looks like Willy Wonka threw up! Can you actually get the bedspins while still out on the street? Whoa, candy cigarettes and pop rocks! Maybe not a good idea right now.
But back to Essex. Had a 3:00 reservation and entered into a crazy cramped and loud bar area. Checked in with the hostess and was told it would be a few minutes. Had to wait amongst the LES scenesters and play body bumpers for about 15 minutes or so alongside the crowded bar. I felt bad for those sitting at the tables along it as all of our asses were constantly pushing into their faces and backs. Nothing like a face full of ass with your omelet! Continue reading Brunch at Essex. Or, how to get sh*tfaced on a NYC afternoon!
Oh my, this just can’t get any better, can it? With all the recent dirt being uncovered about Anthony “Carlos Danger” Weiner, I am amazed that this guy just refuses to throw in the towel on his mayoral campaign. Maybe it’s time to start shoveling the dirt over the grave of his political career and bury it for good. Maybe it’s stubbornness. Maybe it’s delusion. Maybe he is just plain crazy. Heck, there are reports that even the Clintons are “deeply displeased” at all of these shenanigans and if that’s coming from their camp with all Bill’s past escapades then you know it’s bad. Yet, Carlos carries on. Penis pics. Sleazy tweets. More twitter relationships being discovered. The lust of his attention spilling the beans to the media and now showing up on tv and magazines. I smell a book deal coming soon. Maybe a stint on reality tv! Maybe the new Bachelorette!
This NYC mayor’s race has kept me delighted and in stiches at the same time. With a rogues lineup of candidates there is certainly no lack of entertainment value here. In fact, I can seen this all going in one direction with an inevitable outcome. Get ready America for your newest team of superhero porn stars! Continue reading It’s Superhero Porno Politics! NYC Style!