Tag Archives: McDonald’s

“Does This Rag Smell Like Chloroform” Blog Party in My Pants!

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Welcome Welcome Welcome! Come on in. Let me take that coat. Saunter up to the bar and have a cocktail. Mix and mingle. What’s that you say? Why yes, this soiree is pants optional. I would have it no other way. Have some chips and dip. I made it myself with my special sauce. Secret ingredient that adds a little kick to it. Don’t even ask. So glad you could all cum, and not too early either. No one wants to be arrive prematurely. Kind of spoils the fun, and your underwear. Yet, this is a way to get a good seat for all the action. Relax! Spread your legs, enjoy, and let many sordid tales be told. I even wore my studded assless leather chaps for this one. Yes, I dress to impress.

Just wanted to offer a big shout out to all my guests! Thanks for dropping in. I see some of you even dressed for the occasion. Oh honey, you shouldn’t have worn that. Dude, does your mommy dress you in the dark. You purposely trying not to get laid? Oh, I kid, I kid. No really. Yes, I do. No. So glad you could all make it to my first ever virtual blog party where you get to take over my abode of a twisted blog. Don’t mind some of the creepers lurking around here. I’m sure by the end of the night anyway you’ll all be half naked in the bathroom doing strange things with my loofah to each other. All I ask is that you clean up after your nasty selves, and if some of you pervs end up in my bedroom be prepared to enter the world of internet porn. Not saying I have cameras hidden around my place. Oh, did you remember to sign the waiver and bring it with you? Just want to be protected in case some of you do damage to yourselves playing with the sex swing and assorted toys laying about. They are just for display purposes only. Wink Wink. Oh, don’t mind that little red light in the bookcase and behind the mirror. It’s nothing. Really. Continue reading “Does This Rag Smell Like Chloroform” Blog Party in My Pants!

A Manly Man’s Guide to Valentine’s Day Romance in NYC.

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Ok, here we go with another Valentine’s Day (massacre) again. I have yet to buy a card or set up flowers to be delivered. Yes, I am one of those dudes that wait all until the last possible minute to actually hit a store and get something for my gal. I mean, what’s the big deal with women when it comes to this overhyped commercialized Hallmark holiday? Bleech. I’m already seeing all kinds of posts on Facebook referring to wonderful plans all these couples have set up for the big day of forced romance. Gag me. Then come Feb 14th all the women will be posting pics of flowers and gifts that their guys sent them. Oh c’mon already. Isn’t a bucket of KFC extra crispy and furry handcuffs enough to make a gal swoon? It’s the gift that keeps on giving! Nothing says romance like greasy fried chicken and sex toys. Are you all feeling me out there? Don’t even get me started on the flowers part. It’s the one time of year that a bouquet of roses cost as much as diamonds. He went to Jared? Nope! He went to Subway with the other Jared and used some of that cash on a $5 foot long. He then hit the local bodega and scored a dozen roses for $10 on the way home. Yessir! I go all out for my main squeeze. Nothing but the best. It’s how I roll!  Continue reading A Manly Man’s Guide to Valentine’s Day Romance in NYC.