As I am turning into a human bathhouse walking the streets of NYC I look around and view people of all types seemingly oblivious to the NYC summer heat and humidity. I don’t get it. There are those walking past me with layers of clothes on, heavy jackets, and thick jeans. Like it’s cold out. I am not kidding here as during my 5 mile run last night in Central Park I actually saw a dude jogging in jeans! IN JEANS! Can you just imagine peeling those off after that? Muenster cheese anyone?
Pretty much how I feel walking around NYC during this heat and humidity – Continue reading I am judging you. I’m judging you hard, New Yorkers.
So, I went to meet my gal at Penn Station the other night after she went out to spend the day with relatives and the first thing she says when she sees me?
“Someone took a huge dump on the train platform! Not just one, but three giant piles of turds!” I laughed, and suggested that maybe it was someone’s dog that pooped there. “Hell no!” she stated. “That was human dukies. No way was that some Pomeranian poop! She was obviously disgusted. Perhaps a bit mortified.
Of course, being the jaded New Yorker that I am I wanted to go down and take pictures of this monster pile of human excrement, but the look she gave me with the side-eye suggested otherwise if I knew what was good for me. Heck, I have enough food porn pics on my cell phone, so why not just add this to my collection? Salad pic. Soup pic. Salmon pic. Dessert pic. Giant turd pic. Fits right in! Continue reading Is That a Human Turd? The Mysteries of NYC Living.
Well, hello fellow bloggers and avid readers. It’s that time once again when I look through my spam filter to discover all the wonderfully weird and lascivious comments I receive here. It’s gonna be Huuuuge. The Best. So Unprecedented. Just Tremendous. The Golden Showers of blog spam!
Let’s Make America Weird Again!
So, let’s dive right into my mailbox and take a peek –
From Penis Pump Austria – There are various kinds of sex toys and products today that can enhance your sexual performance, from lubricants for women experiencing dryness, to realistic dildos and blow up dolls for those missing their partner. Continue reading The Golden Showers of Blog Spam!
Here’s wishing everyone a safe, happy, and healthy New Year. 2016 for many was just a total abomination of a year, and as we head into 2017 there is much trepidation and uneasiness of what the future holds in store. Yet, the new year also brings the opportunity for personal growth, renewed fortitude, and better times ahead. It’s times like these that good friends and loving family are much valued, and should be held close.
Life truly is short, and we only have a certain amount of time here on this planet. Stop procrastinating. Make a change. Do something worthwhile. Get healthy. Face your fears. Make a difference. Make amends. Love someone. Reach out. Put petty differences aside. Show you care. See the world. Lend a hand. Do something crazy. Stop worrying. Laugh more. Go for it.
In the immortal words of Ferris Bueller –
Continue reading Free Falling Face First into the New Year. Happy 2017!