Tag Archives: funny

Mr Sandman must hate New Yorkers

rod-smart-he-hate-me-nflMr Sandman. He hate me.

I seem to have a love/hate relationship with Mr Sandman lately. I love sleep, but I think he hates me. Recently, I have been trying to go to bed a bit earlier just to get some extra shut eye. Of course, now when I do that I can’t fall alseep right away. Like many of us I have developed a bad habit of watching tv until 2 or 3am and falling asleep on the couch. That’s ok for my fiancee’ Stacey as she claims I snore so loud she is one night going to kill me in my sleep. She goes to bed first and gets to sleep for a few hours before I come in and unleash all Hell upon her with my sounds of sleep ecstasy. I really don’t believe her, as how come I never hear it? I think she is hallucinating. If she reads this post I think she will put a pillow over my snoring face and send me to sleep with the fishes.
Continue reading Mr Sandman must hate New Yorkers

In NYC Big Brother is watching you – and helping you pee!

big-brother-animatedI don’t normally write about politics. In fact, I can’t stand politics, but it is a fact of life and it creeps into our everday lives like a hemorrhoid that just won’t go away. Like death and taxes government just seems to be something that is a guarantee in our lives. I recently viewed a television report that covered the proposed ban on smoking in cars because having a cigarette while driving might help cause cars accidents. Really? What’s next? No radio playing in cars because it takes away from driver concentration? How about no speaking while driving too so the driver can focus on the road? It really is getting out of hand, and seems that politicians have nothing better to do than come up with stupid law proposals just so it will look like they are actually doing something to earn the positions we voted them in for. If we as a people don’t put a stop to this there will be an abundance of crazy rules and regulations that will be enforced on us. Hey, just look over at our Mayoro Bloombito here in NYC as he has come up with some doozies over the years. Before we know it, Big Brother Government will be taking part in the most mundane aspects of our lives!

I can envision the following ridiculous proposals our politicians will come up with.

Continue reading In NYC Big Brother is watching you – and helping you pee!

Don’t Be A Turd Burglar!

854566-toilet-cubicleIt’s Monday morning and I already have started the day out with a “what the eff moment”.  You all know how it is when you drag yourself out of bed, into the shower, and arrive at work with that first cup of hot coffee. You slowly wake up from the grogginess that drapes your brain. You get your desk situated and set up a plan of attack for the day, and for what comes before you over the afternoon. Your body as it awakens let’s you know that it needs to hit the bathroom to start your day off right. If any of you are like me sometimes all it takes is one cup of morning coffee and “whammo”! Time to poop! Ah, there is nothing like a good morning constitutional to start the day off right. Everything is moving along swimmingly until some idiot “Turd Burglar” comes along and messes up your whole routine.

I think it’s time for a bit of ranting when it comes to toilet etiquette. Now, I can’t speak about the women’s room situation so if any of the fairer sex want to pipe in just do so and let ‘er rip!

Please don’t stop me to chat when you see I am about to enter the men’s room. Especially if I have something to read with me. Doubly so if you see me running to the can!

Continue reading Don’t Be A Turd Burglar!

NYC Men’s Fashion – WTF? Do you dress in the dark?

3p9o61

In this day and age of fashion it just boggles me when I see the way some guys dress. It makes me wonder if any of them really look in a mirror before leaving the house in the morning.  Now I will be the first to admit being a casual dresser, as my job does not require upscale business attire every day, but I do otherwise dress to look good, and when out on the road seeing clients the suit and tie is the required uniform. Some men out there know how to rock their clothes, and I applaud them. Then there are the others that I see every day in NYC on the subways and walking the streets that make me roll my eyes in anguish.

Or laughter!

I realize that dressing well will make a dent in the wallet. I have fried my credit card at times when out clothes shopping. I know that not everyone can sometimes afford expensive threads, yet there are ways to look stylish without breaking the bank. Many stores nowadays carry name brand duds that are made and priced for the “regular guy” out there. Kohl’s, KMart, Target and others offer an alternative to the overpriced designer lines that make clothes shopping a nightmare. Let’s face it, most guys hate shopping to begin with as we would rather be at a bar watching the game, or chilling out on our couch playing video games. I need to go out myself and update my wardrobe but I am too damn lazy to give up a weekend day to do it. I need a personal shopper! Why can’t I be rich?

Here are a few don’ts when it comes to menswear. These are just my opinions as I do realize that everyone has their own views on what is fashionable and what isn’t. I really think some people get dressed in the dark.

Continue reading NYC Men’s Fashion – WTF? Do you dress in the dark?