Tag Archives: Douchebag

You don’t mess with NYC during the morning rush. The MTA already angers us enough.

 

Has anyone noticed the world is going a bit nutty lately?

I mean, really, some idiot tried to detonate a makeshift pipe bomb strapped to his chest in the NYC subway? Then, pretty much almost blew himself up because this self-proclaimed terrorist lunatic did not know what he was doing? He picked out a busy tunnel walkway because it had Christmas advertising, which he hated, and it was the morning rush hour. Forget the pipe bomb almost killing him. He is lucky that angry New Yorkers on their way to work did not tear him apart! You don’t mess with us during our morning commute, as most are in an angry mood already dealing with getting to work, and on a mission to get from Point A to Point B.  Get outta my way!

Especially if we didn’t have our morning “Cup O’Joe” yet! Continue reading You don’t mess with NYC during the morning rush. The MTA already angers us enough.

Fall season is finally here and the rantings continue!

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It’s been a while since I let out my frustrations. So many things that make me want to scream out loud and bang my head against the wall lately. Sometimes, these same irritants come around seasonally, and others come out of left field like a pigeon taking a dump on my head. Let’s start with the most obvious one. And away we go!

1) Pumpkin everything – Really, what the heck? How can such a little used member of the squash family make everyone become so crazed once Labor Day hits? It’s like the population becomes hypnotized and metamorphosizes into zombies craving brains, um, pumpkin flavored everything. Sure, I love me some pumpkin pie at Thanksgiving, but enough is enough. Let’s be real here – most of these over-flavored pumpkin foods and drinks taste like crap anyway. Either way too sweet or just bland.

2) The hot weather – I am so sick of the warm humid swamp ass weather. I am so ready for the cool, crisp, dry and comfortable Fall season. Can Summer please just go away already. I’m done with you. Bye Felicia! Continue reading Fall season is finally here and the rantings continue!

Buffalo Snow, Elf on a Shelf, Cocaine – All kinds of crazy stuff!

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Am I the only one that loathes the bombardment of Christmas commercials and decorations that we are subjected to these weeks before Thanksgiving? It’s already been one of those weeks here in NYC and I feel as if I’m being abused by the Elf on the Shelf. Now let’s be real here for a moment. That damn thing is creepy. No way do I want a psychopath elf in my house. I don’t know why this strange tradition was started anyway. It’s supposed to be moved to a different spot each night or something. Yeah, let’s traumatize our kids. No, let’s terrorize me because if that little bastard shows up in a different spot other than where I left him I’m burning down the damn house! I freak out a bit when I can’t find my keys and swear something moved them. Anyone remember that evil little Zuni fetish doll in the movie Trilogy of Terror? Yeah THAT evil effing thing that chased Karen Black around and attacked her. I just know that damn elf is the reincarnation of that crazy little shit. Waiting. Plotting. He’s as bad as a creepy clown.

Almost. Clowns suck too. And dolls. They also suck. Nope. Nope. Noppity Nope. Continue reading Buffalo Snow, Elf on a Shelf, Cocaine – All kinds of crazy stuff!

The infuriating freakshow follies of lunchtime in NYC.

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What is the deal with some people and their lunchtime eating habits? Here in NYC we are surrounded by places to eat lunch from delis, to bodegas, restaurants, and fast food. One of the most common during the workdays that many of us frequent are the multi-station delis with the hot and cold pay by the pound buffets. Nothing wrong with this as I enjoy getting my lunch off of these throughout the week, and I can mix and match whatever strikes my fancy at the time. Except when I have to deal with the general public and the nasty things I see them do around these food stations. Just a few examples of what we encounter on a daily basis when out foraging for a lunch meal –

1) The inconsiderate jerk who sneezes into the food. Nothing grosses me out more than when I see someone sneeze right onto the open food stations and doesn’t even bother to cover their nose. It’s like a watching a high power water sprinkler blast everything with mucus spray and disease. I swear this is how everyone will become infected and start the zombie apocalypse. It won’t start at some CDC center or faraway land. It will begin in the tray of baked salmon and soba noodles at my local deli. Continue reading The infuriating freakshow follies of lunchtime in NYC.