The news coming out regarding the Mayor’s race here in NYC just becomes weirder and weirder as the days progress. It seems there is a lot more hidden that is just a zipper pull away from being released upon a ravenous public itching for more of Carlos Danger! His overexposed member just seems to be everywhere these days. It’s the talk of the town. I’m really starting to think that Carlos is real, and hacked into poor Anthony Weiner’s Twitter account. He wants exposure and the more he gets the more excited he becomes. He loves the ladies, and the ladies can’t seem to get enough of Carlos Danger! He is a man about town, and the more dangerous he is, the more the glamorous he becomes. After the last 36 years of Mayor Bloomberg’s overdrawn and boring dictatorship locking down the city and turning it into a homogenized Disneyland we need someone like Carlos Danger to spice it up a bit and set us free! I can just envision it –
Carlos Danger lifts the ridiculous “caberet laws” that bans dancing in bars and pubs. Carlos can be found constanty jumping on top of the bar doing belly shots each night. He loves his public!
Carlos Danger spotted about town with a trio of supermodels and porn stars on his arm enjoying the nightlife. He is “The Most Interesting Member on Twitter”.
Carlos Danger bringing back the X-Rated filth to Times Square. Including the spank-bank Peep Show booths of which he has a personalized private Mayor’s booth for him and his guests.
Carlos Danger enables the whole city and parks areas to have free wifi, and offers everyone complimentary smart phones with personal Twitter accounts. Stay in touch close and personal with Carlos and view his myriad amount of Twit pics!
Carlos Danger letting anyone drink any size soda they want! Suck on that Bloomberg!
Carlos Danger turning Gracie Mansion into a nightclub that harkens back to the days of Studio 54’s debauchery! Celebrities abound. A grotto pool area is installed on the grounds and during the day and night many well known faces can be seen there. Bill & Hillary have lifetime free passes!
Carlos Danger offers free penis pills to anyone who wants them. Just walk up to the counter at your local drug store and proclaim “Carlos sent me”! Stay hard my friends.
Carlos Danger bringing the Mets back to relevancy. If it’s one thing that Carlos knows, it’s how to erect a flaccid franchise!
Carlos Danger names every Monday “Morning Wood Monday” and declares it a day off enabling everone to have three day weekends during is Mayorship!