I’m on Vacation! Pina Coladas, Island Hopping, Off The Grid!

 

53375388

I’m on vacation! Hand me a frozen cocktail and don’t be stingy with the rum!

Finally going on a real vacation out of the country for a week. Heading out on a Caribbean cruise with my gal and parents. Dad likes to drink and mom likes to gamble. We all love to eat. On a cruise ship that is a winning, if deadly, combination. Drinking, eating, gambling, island hopping and shopping. I think I might experience almost all of the Seven Deadly Sins over these seven days. We’ll make the most of it though I’m sure and have some great fun. I just need to keep in mind a list of things to adhere to that will help make my vacation time more enjoyable. Lord knows spending the week with the parental units will cause some stress to begin with.

1. I will not be on social networks of any kind as soon as that cruise ship pulls away from the port. It’s called a vacation for a reason! I am totally disconnecting for a week. Off the grid. Incommunicado. Lost in space. See ya!

2. I will not be posting vacation pictures on Facebook, Instagram, Yelp, Twitter, Snapchat, Tinder, LinkedIn, Clown Sex Weekly, or any other internet site. I will not be one of  “those” people who feel the need to post a million pictures of everywhere they go every minute of their vacations on social media. It’s almost as if people forgot how to actually kick back and enjoy the destinations and sights they experience. They just run around looking for photo ops to quickly post and show off to their friends and followers. Dozens of pictures. Hundreds of them. Thousands. Honestly, none of us really care. Just stop already. Go have fun, enjoy, and download the pics when you get back. We’ll see them later on.

Funniest_Memes_my-dad-before-every-vacation-we-ever-took_461

3. A Selfie Stick. No. Just…….No.

4. A fanny pack will not be worn. That is just advertising that you are a dork tourist on vacation. Especially when you’re in another country. What makes the look even worse? Wearing black or brown socks, shorts, and sandals. Don’t even think of wearing jorts. You’ll look like someone who just finished shopping at Walmart. Don’t do it.

5. There will be no counting calories. Why go on a vacation if you can’t fully indulge? We work hard all year long so splurging a bit on ourselves is a right well deserved. Have that second helping! Eat that third dessert! I want to drink so much booze I almost vomit on the ship’s captain! As long as I don’t fall overboard it’s all good. Safety first! Now hand me that frozen pina colada and slice of cake. I’ll sit my fat ass down and be a gluttonous pig, thank you very much.

MjAxMy1lNmRmMjI4ZGFlNjA3MzM1_520be38f8e3de

6. In response to #5 it also does not mean I neglect my fitness. Cruise ships nowadays have killer gyms on board so getting in a few workouts will be on the agenda. Gotta kept in shape somewhat during a week of gluttony. I need my pants to still fit when I get home. Hmmm……wonder if I will be allowed to drink while on the treadmill? It’s all about hydration baby. Even if it’s one of those tropical drinks with an umbrella on it.

7. Do not be the “Ugly American”. I know I’ll be a guest in another land. Be respectful and don’t do anything stupid. Last thing I want to do is wake up in a jail cell in Haiti next to Jean Pierre.

8. I will not be wearing a Speedo while at the pool. I will also not be sharing a hot tub with a  bunch of overweight hairy dudes. No public nudity. This is a vacation not a nightmare.

6265653e2c239f77d0576a4f1649ebf2155a62e387f88acdf39d1ed6d05f3741

9. Can’t think about the money. Nothing is cheap in life anymore. We are all here for a short time and can’t take it with us when we go to that vacation villa in the sky. I know we will spend some coin on this trip and my credit cards might take a beating. So what? I’m going to eat and drink well, be entertained, pampered and taken care of. Plus, spending the time with my family is worth it. Can’t put a price on happiness.

10. Do not think about work, or sneaking away to the internet cafe on board to check emails. I know I can be a workaholic at times. I even went into the office the day after Thanksgiving to get work done even though the office was closed. Must resist. The company won’t collapse the week I am out. I just can’t be all stressed out thinking about all those emails I’ll probably have when I get back. Need to enjoy life first.

57480285
Carnival Cruise line? Oh hell no!

 

 

 

As the saying goes we should “work to live and not live to work”!

Bon voyage! See you all in a week. Stay safe and be well.

16 thoughts on “I’m on Vacation! Pina Coladas, Island Hopping, Off The Grid!”

  1. Nice, we just got back from a cruise the week before Thanksgiving, and like you I totally disconnected from the rest of the world. Unfortunately, that didn’t stop half of the ship from getting the social package and posting anything and everything on Facebook, Instagram, etc. 🙁

    What line are you traveling on? We did the Carnival Glory and had a really good time!
    Sujeet recently posted…Guys Gab Hottie Of The Week – Ashley AlexissMy Profile

    1. Hey Sujeet!

      We always travel Royal Caribbean. Went with my parents as they are Diamond members and we are Platinum. Lots of perks that way between us. Had a wonderful cruise! Perfect weather and the ship was terrific! I didn’t want to get off that boat!

      Yes, it was so relaxing to not bother with email or the internet for a whole week. Now back to the real world!
      filbio310 recently posted…Olives! Hummus! Babaganoush! Peri Ela on the UES of NYC.My Profile

  2. Have a great holiday Phil! ‘Shame that we won’t be able to see how you get on, on the cruise. Yep! I’m one of those people although if with the family, in moderation, like once a day and always somewhat cryptic for security reasons! But if I’m travelling solo, then let the good times roll and where-is-Victoria-now lol!
    p.s When I go on holiday, I never worry about the calories and we indulge in all the lovely glasses of wine, all of the rustic meals, all of the local desserts and plenty of the brewery beers!!

    A few years ago, we went to Tuscany in Italy and we even joined in the local very-long-table-for-whoever-wants-to-join-we’re-a-small-village-but-you’re-welcome-just-leave-a-small-donation street festival. So we did. Cups of Italian red wine were going for 50 cents a pop. We were very happy when we left that night and extremely flushed let me tell you!
    Victoria recently posted…A Short Introduction To Berlin: #bestofBerlinMy Profile

    1. Hey Victoria!

      We had a terrific time with my parents. They love cruising and are also diamond members of Royal Caribbean so we got some nice perks. They both love the islands, love to eat, and my dad loves to party so we all got along great! No complaints as it was a perfect trip – the ship, weather, the food, the entertainment. I wish I was back on the ship!
      filbio310 recently posted…Olives! Hummus! Babaganoush! Peri Ela on the UES of NYC.My Profile

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

CommentLuv badge