Words just can’t describe my new found love for this craptacular bar! I mean, it has a freaking toilet as it’s profile picture on review sites. How can you not love a dive bar that gives new meaning to what a dive is supposed to be about? Oddly unique, yet you feel afraid for your safety just a bit, but still drawn to it like a drug addict trapped in a crack house.
Um, what is this dark weird little fake bar before a bar that you have to pass through to get to The Duck? Is this a dive speakeasy kind of thing? Some beefy dude at the door checks your ID and lets you in. You meander through the empty faux bar in front to get to the entrance of the real bar.
Then it hits you when you walk in. What is this wonderful place that looks like a hospital or insane asylum basement dorm room decorated in the most makeshift way? It’s almost as if a bunch of drunk college kids watched Animal House and decided to make mom and dad’s basement a dive bar with crap they found on the side of the road or in a dumpster. There are wires, cables, extension cords, and surge protectors hanging all over the place. One short and the place goes up in a burst of flame! Beer signage, strange memorabilia, and old discarded bras hang on the wall and ceiling. Christmas lights. A few tables and chairs to sit at next to the bar. A pool table in front of a large projection flat screen from 1990 which I think is broken. Strange mix of locals, some tourists, and even a tv celebrity hanging out pounding down the drinks. I felt like we were in some surreal reality show. And why the heck is there country music playing in here? Good lord! I am falling in love! Where is Anthony Bourdain when you need him? Surely, he would feel at home here. He loves these weirdo bars.
Amazing, cute, and super perky Asian girl mans the bar and as soon as our group walks in offers up the ladies a free round of shots. Sorry guys, you get nothing as you have the wrong equipment. No biggie, as this has to be one of the cheapest bars I have ever encountered. Tap beer pints are $3-$4. Bass, Blue Moon, Bud, Bud Light, Yuengling, Coors Light, and Patriot. Bottles and cans start at $2.75. Pitchers at $6.50. It’s just so cheap it’s obscene! I think at happy hour they pay you to drink. We did a few rounds of shots and she was offering them up at super cheap prices she invented along the way. You can even bring in your own food, and there is a pizza place across the street. This is the bar to go to on a budget! It’s the kind of place where the odd “people of Wal-Mart” hang out at. Loooove it!
OK – now for even more trashiness. The top of the toilet in the men’s room is made of duct tape. Yup. Duct tape. It doesn’t get any better than this.
Epic crappiest dive bar in El Barrio! Travel up north into Spanish Harlem and experience it at least once. It’s so cheesy you want to laugh, but get sucked into it’s charm. Hey, it’s a super cheap night out. Love that it’s up in my neck of the woods too! I am glad my friends and I are so low-brow that we freakin’ love this place! I love a good crappy dive bar!
The Duck –