I just don’t get the boner over pumpkin spice friggin’ everything that occurs in this country as soon as Labor Day hits. It’s like the official first day of Fall happens when coffee shops start promoting this vile tasting oversweet concoction. White girls in yoga pants come out of the woodwork like an army of pumpkin zombies and run to get a cup. Now, I’m not saying I hate pumpkin as in fact I love me a good slice or two of pumpkin pie during the holiday season. Throw on a scoop of good old fashioned vanilla ice cream and I’m in dessert bliss. It’s just that the sheeple in this country go way overboard with this nasty trend. Most things that are pumpkinated are really not that good, and taste either really bland or super sugery. Not withstanding the fact that many of these pumpkined food and drinks are filled with chemicals to attain the fake flavor we put in our bodies which can’t be all that healthy. Yuck. Sorry, but I’ll pass. Not a pumpkin spice fan. Sorry, not sorry.
I think it’s as crazy as when we start seeing Christmas stuff in the stores before Halloween, and the ads that are already starting to pop up on TV already. Stop! Slow the eff down!
I mean, you have to admit it gets kind of crazy when all of a sudden every store, ad, and Facebook timeline update starts to feature pumpkin spice everything. Non-stop.
I love coffee. Just a good regular cup o’ joe. Sometimes a nice cappuccino. I don’t want my coffee to taste like some weird gourd that we pay no attention to until Halloween.
Also, does everything we eat have to have some strange pumpkin flavoring added to it? It’s like these companies have some stoned out of their minds food scientists mixing and matching everything with pumpkin. No, I don’t want my lunch buritto pumpkin flavored!
What’s next? Pumpkin spiced for his or her pleasure?
Or this for that special someone in your life? Oh hellz no!
Next thing we know it will be part of our entertainment on stage and screen. As if this group wasn’t bad enough already….
Heck, it is the preferred Fall season hot beverage of not only white girls in yoga pants but hipsters everywhere! Since they are ruining Brooklyn, and most of us can’t stand them, these posers fit in quite well with this fake drink.
Personally, I just can’t even. I can’t literally even!
I think this sounds like a great script for a horror movie. Fall release of course. With theaters serving pumpkin flavored popcorn, sodas, and candy. Everyone attending will be wearing yoga pants as admission requirement.
It’s unavoidable. Unescapable. Like we have been replaced by the pumpkin spice pod people. As the Borg leader in Star Trek proclaimed “Resistance is Futile”. Fight back with all your will people! Don’t give in to this tyrannical entity!
As for me, well, I’m over it already. Nope. Nada. As the anti-drug campaign slogan says – Just Say No!