I just devoured the juicy awesomeness that is the Manly Burger. I am all that is Man. And then some!
It’s kind of surreal that just a few weeks ago I dined at Umami Burger here in NYC and enjoyed every bite of this fatty, meaty, cheesy, caloriffic-laden burgery goodness. I have been sitting on this review since then and over that time I had an epiphany of sorts. I actually have decided to stop eating meat. What??? Yeah, I know, right? Seafood and healthier nutrient dense options are on the agenda now. I don’t know if I would really class myself as a Pescatarian just yet as I still love a good steak. Yet, lately I just started to get sick of eating fatty greasy meat products and yearned for a change. Especially since I am now ramping up my workouts to get in shape for summer. Let’s just see how this grand experiment all works out for me over the next three or four months.
In the meantime, let us chat about this manliness that I wrapped my lips around, shall we?
This manlier than man burger is all about the house beer-cheddar cheese, bacon lardons, smoked-salt onion strings, Umami ketchup, and mustard spread. I ain’t kidding! This manly meat was shoved into my mouth with juicy abandon, soft buns and all. Manly buns.
As a side of manliness I feasted on a side of thick cut & malt battered Tempura Onion Rings, and some Maple Bacon Fries that featured maple-braised bacon lardons, rosemary Aleppo salt, and topped with chives. There was more than enough man-food here for me to engorge on and push deep into my mouth. Even as the manly drool ran down my chin there was no giving up. A real man takes it all in. Deeply.
Decent selection of craft beers on tap, wine, non-alcoholic drinks, burger choices, sides, and some salad/non-meat choices for those manly man enough to eat them.
A bit pricey, maybe, but the service was more than quick and manly enough. The setting is kind of upscale fast foody with a taint of manly decor set in. Normally, I have heard this place gets pretty crowded with long lines during the day. The night we arrived here it was half empty so we had no problems entering this manly glory hole of burger ecstasy to dine.
ARE YOU MANLY ENOUGH FOR THIS MEAT?
Maybe one day I will return for more manliness, but for now I will relish in the memory of this manly meat-fest.

Umami Burger – http://www.umamiburger.com/locations/greenwich-village/
Hi, Phil! Looks great!
Hey Fearless!
It was magically delicious!
My arteries just clogged up looking at all of that meat.
Hey Mary!
I made sure to bring a cardiologist with me for this dining experience!
Is this a man only zone or can women enter too? It looks like a true calorie overload Phil but yummy with it too. The killer for me is those onion rings, I just love them.
Best of luck on the fish. I’d actually recommend it since I much prefer fish to meat anyway and as you say it is generally a lot healthier.
Hey Guy!
Even the ladies love this meat in their mouths!
It was one of my last meaty feasts. Over a month ago and I’m sticking with fish, veggies, and healthy eating. No red meats or fried foods, chicken, or otherwise. Been doing great so far.
Mouth watering once again. May have to check this place out when I’m in NY in June.
Hey Cassandra!
It’s worth a check. So many good spots to get a burger but they have some cool versions here to try.
Dear Lord Phil! It looks very cavemanish, in a delicious clean your plate sort of way.
Hey Lisa!
In a sexy cave man devouring a meat carcass sort of way, yes!
If manly means a love for greasy, dirty burgers, then I’m definitely a man:) And bacon fries? OMG!
It’s funny that you mention that you’re considering quitting meat. My husband and I have had the exact same thoughts (minus the exercise) and in the beginning of this year we agreed on trying to only eat red meat on weekends and otherwise just stick to a plant and seafood based diet.It went quite ok, but now my carnivore parents are here to visit, so we’re pausing the project for the next week or two:)
Hey Mitzie!
This meal can turn a petite fair lady into a glatenuttonous cave man!
Have not eaten any red meats or fried foods for over a month now and have not missed it. Also, you do know that having the parents over is just an easy excuse to give up, right? 🙂
Will definitely have to check this out the next time I’m down there.. And it looks like the prices aren’t too bad either!
Hey Sujeet!
I thought it was pretty good. Very different from the normal burger joints in town.
I’m all for getting healthier, but giving up meat? Whaaat? Phil? Did somebody capture you?
I’m at a loss for words! I don’t know what to say! Say it ain’t so! Burgers from around NYC celebrate!
Seafood is a good choice, though. Love me some seafood. That burger does look delish, though. That being said, I may have avoided it, too, with all that it has!
Hey PJ!
It’s an easy switch for me as I love seafood and am actually a decent cook. Even though red meats and greasy burgers taste good, it’s not really that healthy.
Yes, this was a good burger though…..