Evilly delicious laughs in NYC

21837512I’m a people watcher. I just can’t help myself. When you live in a city populated with around 19,000,000 people there are just so many things they can do that can go hysterically wrong on a daily basis. Hey, I’m not perfect and can be a klutz at times myself. Yet, being the New Yorker that I am, there are moments when I can’t help but snicker at these hapless victims. It is just so evilly delicious when you come upon moments like these that leave an indelible image in your brain for the day. Yeah, I know it’s kind of mean, but I am wired to be a bit warped that way!

Some of my viewing guilty pleasures –

1) Guys in suits picking up piles of dog crap with their hand in a plastic bag. I even snicker more when it’s a hot sticky summer day out!

2) Women who’s ankles look like they are snapping in half because they are walking in super high heels and don’t really know how to walk in them. Snap, crackle, pop!

3) Watching some jerk run through the crowd and cut ahead of people to make the subway train that is about to pull out and the door shuts in his face. The conductor ignores him. Sucker!

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4) Seeing a really big guy walking a small little yippy dog that belongs in a pocketbook.

5) Watching the person who spills a whole cup of coffee on themselves because they forgot to put the lid on tight running out of Starbucks.

6) Seeing people getting soaked in the rain because they refuse to carry an umbrella. Nice expensive suit bro! You now smell like wet dog all day!

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7) Watching a person leave a store and walk into an entrance door because one side is locked. (Usually that is me also smacking my noggin against the glass!)

8) Viewing a person ahead of me trip on a crack in the sidewalk and then look around to see if anybody saw. I smile and wave hello!

9) Seeing people step in poop on the sidewalk while heading to the subway. Yuck. Avoid those sidewalk land mines!

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10) Observing the guy/lady leaning against the pole/railing and ignoring the “wet paint” sign. Oooh – nice new dress pattern!

11) Seeing a douche leaving his expensive sportscar in a no-parking zone and getting a ticket before he can run back out of the store/Starbucks. Enjoy that $100 cup of coffee!

12) Watching the person ahead of me swiping their Metro Card and running through the turnstile only to be cut in half by the bar as the card did not register. Ouch! That’s gonna leave a mark!

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Really – this city slays me!

What do you see out there daily that people do to make you laugh?

37 thoughts on “Evilly delicious laughs in NYC”

  1. This post got me laughing so hard. That’s a good thing, I need a laugh every now and then. You just explained it all. The most embarrassing thing that happens to me often, is running to work and tripping over the sidewalk, and falling down and ripping my pants. The worst part is looking behind me and realizing that I didn’t trip over anything, it was just a crack. I’ve lost count of the number of times I had to go in to work with holes in my pants from falling down.
    Susana King recently posted…Deaf Lady Teaches You More Sign LanguageMy Profile

  2. Funny as usual! I commit numbers 7 and 12 on a regular basis… but in Chicago, so at least I have not felt your judgment :). People watching is awesome. This was a very fun post to read! You should do a series.

    I would like to add another one: when cocky bicyclists fail: I once had my serpentine belt (at the time I had no idea what this was, my car just lost the ability to steer) break on a bridge when I was 18 in the summer. A cocky bicyclists drove by, laughed at me, and told me that’s what I get for not taking the subway. Little did he know I was helping a friend move that day, so I had to drive. Anyways, after being a complete dick and further adding to my anxiety he almost hit a hub cap in the street, swerved and hit the curb, and sailed over his bike handles into the guard rail. He got up and ran away with his bike. I almost peed myself laughing. I guess karma does exists.
    Jean recently posted…Punch Someone in the Face Lately?My Profile

    1. Hey Jean!

      Thanks so much! Glad you approve of my craziness!

      I have done #7 myself and #12 on occasion. Just hope no one was looking.

      If I saw that happen to the douche nozzle cyclist I would have shat myself laughing so hard! Karma is a beyotch! πŸ™‚
      filbio310 recently posted… Evilly delicious laughs in NYC My Profile

  3. Things that make me laugh on a daily basis in a mean way? Nothing quite daily, but there are a few things.
    First timers at Starbucks trying to figure out how to place an order that sounds like they know what they’re talking about…(let’s face it, Starbucks is good, but also highly pretentious).
    Fair skinned people who come to Florida and think that they can’t get sun burned because it’s “too cloudy out”.
    People at the beach who put sunscreen on, but miss one giant strip on their back or legs that turns lobster red.
    People who are so busy talking to someone else that they don’t notice the tree in front of them till they walk into it.
    Kitt Crescendo recently posted…Common Household Items Making Playtime FUN!My Profile

    1. Hi Kitt!

      I admit to being part of the Starbuck Borg. Hey, I am a gold card member and get a lot of free stuff from them so don’t judge me!

      LOL – I know what you mean by FL sun. I was one of those idiots in the past. My fam is in Ocala so I know how hot it gets.

      I love watching klutzy people!
      filbio310 recently posted… Evilly delicious laughs in NYC My Profile

      1. I kind of figured you’d be a Starshmucks guy. I am, too. But it is kind of fun to watch a newbie struggle to place an order. πŸ˜‰
        And while I’m at it…here’s a bit of Starbucks humor for you…
        http://youtu.be/Xi9BRgjvOlk

        As for the people…it’s even more fun when it’s NOT due to klutziness. If you can’t walk and chew gum at the same time and you know it, stop trying!
        Kitt Crescendo recently posted…Common Household Items Making Playtime FUN!My Profile

  4. Ha! My favorite; people who try to introduce their dog to my cat when he’s puffed up and ready to tear their nose off! The poor dog looks at his owner as if to say, “Why are you doing this to me?”
    Nancy Alborell recently posted…Did I Do That?My Profile

  5. Yes, this is the main reason I enjoy going to NY. We are big time people watchers and NY has an overflow of people who are so eclectic yet amusing. But I have to admit, every time I go, I am that person that gets sliced by the turnstile. Every time! It never fails. It’s always the wrong Metro Card or funds depleted.

    Chow,
    Carica
    Carica recently posted…Thank you for leaving me while I was PREGNANTMy Profile

    1. Hi Guy!

      Glad you liked my newest crazy blog post! Yah, #8 is am evil one. LOL!

      Yes, I just read your email. Sounds like a nice idea. I’ll look into it more over the weekend and get back to you. I appreciate you’re wanting to work with me on a blog post trade.
      filbio310 recently posted… Evilly delicious laughs in NYC My Profile

  6. People watching is so much fun!

    I have always wondered about #4. Is it his dog or hers? Is there more than one of them? If there is one small dog there are usually 4 or 5 more back at home, it seems like small dogs come in packs!
    Emily recently posted…Random Quote SaturdayMy Profile

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